


Oceans

by NCISVILLE



Category: Victoria (TV)
Genre: Confessions, Coronation Ball, Dancing, Doll 123, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-09
Updated: 2016-09-09
Packaged: 2018-08-14 00:54:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7992634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NCISVILLE/pseuds/NCISVILLE
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's afraid of drowning in the ocean of affection he feels for Queen Victoria. He's trying to fight the waves but sometimes a current catches you and pulls you under and even though it's scary it might just be exactly what he needed. </p><p>Doll 123 scene fix. "I don't want to retire. I want to dance with you!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oceans

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for all of the wonderful comments you all left on my other fic. You gave me the courage to write another one as so many of you asked so here's another! I'm sure more will follow.

Oceans

 

Regal, elegant, stunning, so very beautiful beyond what words could adequately describe. Victoria was indeed every inch a queen and upon first glance he had to pause to catch his breath. She was achingly beautiful that he had to remind himself of her age. It was not proper to look at such a young woman in the way he was, let alone allow thoughts of an altogether more devious nature. Still…he could not withhold his eyes from following her and the second her eyes found him from where she was being spun his heart skipped a beat. It was juvenile he knew, to be developing such feelings for someone with whom he could not display obvious affections towards. He tried to stop watching her but it seemed she could pry her eyes away either for she kept anxiously trying to turn and keep him in sight. The realization made his heart skip again and once more he tried to reign in his emotions. He noticed someone walk up beside him and it pained him to have to tear away his gaze from such a beautiful wonder. 

“You have been missed.” Stated Lady Emma. 

As soon as he’d identified the presence beside him he turned his head back to where he longed to be and once more found Victoria. 

“She seems to be managing quite well.” They stood in silence as he watched her with a small content smile that to anyone else would not have been noticed. Even after the dance was finished he could not bear to take his eyes off of her. She was so stunning, so ethereal; her very aura was enticing and demanded attention. The sight of her was simply intoxicating and he knew that if he looked long enough he would not need a glass of champagne to become drunk. 

He’d forgotten about the person beside him, so lost in Victoria was he until he was jolted by the Lady saying, “Are you going to watch her all night?” 

He could only breathe out a laugh and did not reply simply for fear of spilling his desirous thoughts. Taking a moment to compose himself he took a breath and looked down before finally speaking in an attempt to show that he wasn’t infatuated even though in his heart he knew that was most certainly a lie. 

“She’s completely artless, I suppose. She no sooner has a thought then she expresses it. She’s too impulsive for a Queen and yet…” He drifted off lost in her beauty and his own ocean of affections that he was having trouble staying afloat in. He smiled at the ease with which she danced and how graceful her movements were. She was a magnificent dancer and he longed to be the one dancing with her. It would serve as an outlet for his affections, whilst remaining in the normative behavior with which was expected of a man in his position. It would be suspicious if he did not in fact dance with her as he was her Prime Minister and private secretary. 

He continued to observe her dance with the Grand Duke and had he looked away he would not have noticed the now uncivil position of the Russian’s hand. His jaw locked tight in fury and he clenched his hands tighter in an attempt to not walk over and shove the man away from her. How dare that animal violate his Queen. Knowing he would surely cause a scene he recruited young Alfred’s help in dismissing the man. 

“Lord Alfred, I think it’s time the Grand Duke found another dancing partner.”

He watched on, eyes set steely on the man that dared touch his Victoria and wished he could give the man a piece of his mind, yet knew doing so would incite more trouble and reveal the true nature of his feelings towards the Queen. He would have to sit back and bite his tongue in an effort to maintain peaceful relations with Russia. 

When she was finally freed from the Grand Duke’s arms he noticed immediately just how unsettled she was and finally moved from his spot to comfort her distress. Melbourne noticed she had gone straight to a glass to settle her nerves and with her age and certain inability to handle her champagne yet, he suspected it would soon lead to trouble if she kept at it. He walked up and waited for her to turn around, happy to finally be in her presence. 

“May I have the honour?” He gave her a small smile to try and ease her nerves and once her hand was in his he whisked her away, holding her firmly and yet gentle at the same time, certainly not as hard as her previous partner. 

“I thought you weren’t going to come.” She spoke with a sad tone. 

“I…had a matter to attend to.” He replied courteously, considering it best to not mention he was mourning his dead son. 

“I thought perhaps you were cross with me.” Victoria confessed, gazing into his eyes. They were drawing him in, pulling him deeper into the raging ocean he was fighting so hard against. He had to tear his gaze away from her bright blue eyes that bore into his soul. 

“You? Never.” He didn’t think it was possible to be cross with her, not when he was falling so fast and hard for her. 

He met her eyes again and for a while they let the music guide them as their minds drifted to the waves of emotion crashing down upon them the longer they stared at one another, so utterly captivated. 

“You dance so well.” She spoke up, interrupting the silence. “I wish I could dance with you every night.” Their eyes met again and his heart slammed against his ribcage as he realized, she desired him also. It was not just the champagne talking, but rather the drink had allowed her inhibitions to be thrown to the wind. She always said what was on her mind before, but now she the drink was allowing her feelings about him to be portrayed. He swallowed back the urge to reply ‘I would like nothing more ma’am.’ and instead replied in an attempt to remind himself why this could not happen. 

“You’re very young.” 

“I am eighteen. Old enough to be Queen.” She replied indignantly. He had to hold back a smile at how fierce his small Queen truly was. “You are not old Lord M.” She added with an amused voice. 

He raised in eyebrows in defense with a sad amusement and replied, “If only that were true.” The song ended and that was his cue that his time with Victoria had sadly, and all too soon, come to a conclusion. Taking a step back he bowed and thanked her for the dance before going off to once more watch her. 

She disappeared off for a little while and upon returning watched her pick up yet another glass of champagne. He inwardly winced and prayed her wits would stay about her. Not moments later was his prayer unanswered and of course she happened to draw the attention of every person in the room. He quickly swept in to try and save her from something more with the best excuse he could think of. 

“Ma’am, it’s awfully hot in here. Perhaps we should take a walk out to the balcony.” 

Thankfully she walked out without a word and he followed after her grateful she had not drawn attention for a second time. Something had clearly upset her when she left and she had once more tried to draw comfort in drink. A part of him wished she had come to him for that comfort but it was better for the both of them that she didn’t. There was no need for a scandal within her first few months of reign. When they got a far enough distance away so that no one else was present or within hearing he spoke. 

“I’m afraid you’re tired ma’am, perhaps you should retire.” He suggested. 

“I don’t want to retire.” She protested. “I want to dance with you!” She reached out and grabbed him, pulling them close to both their shock. 

He tried to pull back but she held tight and once he met her eyes he lost the will to move away to a more appropriate distance. For a minute they stared in each other’s eyes, completely lost and drowning in the other. He forgot his own name and why he had even been sad earlier that day as he gazed into her own seeking eyes. He heard her breath hitch, and saw her swallow as they stared and he could not think of anything he wanted more in that moment than to dance with her. 

“Would…you accompany me down the hall to the dining hall?” He found himself asking. He should have insisted she go to bed but instead he was asking to lead her away from the public to dance with him in private. If someone saw them and word got out there would indeed be a scandal. For some reason just this once he was willing to indulge both himself and her at the expense of their reputation. 

“Why do you wish to go there?” She inquired not following his thoughts. 

“To dance, ma’am.” 

“But there’s no music there, or a ballroom floor Lord M. The ballroom is through those doors behind us.” She stated, confused by him. 

“One doesn’t need music to dance ma’am.” 

“But that would just be silly to dance without music.” 

“Trust me my Queen.” He smiled and held out his hand for her to take. Without hesitation she placed her hand in his again and let him lead her to the dining hall. 

Much to his delight the hall was empty and there was enough space to twirl her around in the candlelit room. He closed the door behind them knowing full well how their actions would undoubtedly be perceived should someone stumble in and find them. Ignoring all this he pulled her closer than he had in public and for a moment he stared into her eyes again, listening to how her breathing altered as he held her this close so their faces were inches apart. He then began to sweep her across the room to the music in his head, never taking his eyes off of her. 

“I don’t believe I’ve told you how beautiful you look tonight ma’am.” 

“Thank you Lord M.” She replied, cheeks turning just a bit pinker in the shadow drawn by candles. 

They were silent again, Victoria letting him lead her across the room as they danced to no music but the own tune their hearts were playing in one accord. No words were spoken but in the intimacy of the candle light their looks shared what their lips could not. 

“Can we keep dancing Lord M?” She asked after a few minutes had passed and he bowed to signal the end of the dance. 

“Is that what you wish to do ma’am?” 

“Very much so. There’s no one else I want to dance with for the rest of my life but you…Lord M.” She confessed softly, the alcohol not giving her enough boldness to look at him as she spoke. 

“I’m not so sure you do. I’m old and boring, surely you would prefer the company of a man closer in age.” 

“I do not care for some boy wishing to be a man to keep me company. I may be young but I’m old enough to know what I want…who I want. And who I want is the man who has been by my side and on my side since my first hour as Queen. I wish to be with you Lord M.” She begged, looking up into his eyes with a silent plea to accept her, to let her love him. 

“I’m flattered ma’am.” He began, heart warm at her confession. “I feel it only right I confess what has been on my mind and in my heart these past few weeks as you have just done to me.” 

Victoria looked to him imploring him to speak. He could see the fear hidden in her eyes that his next words may reject her and send her heart plummeting to the floor, shattering on the hardwood. He took her hand and began to rub circles on it to comfort her before looking back up and meeting her eyes in the dim, flickering light of the candles. His heart began to slam against his chest as he readied himself for the words he said he would never confess aloud and yet found himself doing. 

“I…I must admit I have not always thought of you innocently. Some thoughts have been criminal and I apologize for that. But you have plagued me since first meet. Try as I may you have never left the forefront of my mind and while I admonish myself for feeling such affections towards a woman of your age I cannot rescind them. I do not think in earnest that I wish to. You have captured my heart ma’am and upon reflection I do not believe myself to be capable of stopping myself from further falling in love with you my Queen.” 

There were tears dropping down her face as he finished speaking and with the gentlest of caresses’ he wiped the tears away with a thumb, in an attempt to prevent them from staining the beautiful face of the woman who had ailed his heart so often. 

“Do you mean it Lord M?” 

“I do your Majesty.” He affirmed with a smile on his lips. 

She returned the smile and held her breath when he lifted her hand up to his lips pressing a soft kiss to a patch of her skin that was now warm from his lips. He held her gaze as he did so which made it all the more intimate but it was not enough for Victoria. She wanted more, wanted to know what a real kiss felt like. 

“Lord M…I…there is a matter I do not have knowledge of and require you for.” 

“What is it ma’am?” He asked ready to help her. 

“I have not yet experienced a kiss and wish to know what it is like.”

“And you would like me to show you?” He asked with a smile. 

“Well…I believe that is your roll of private secretary, to teach me the things I do not know.” She replied playfully. 

“So it is.” He replied observing her face for a moment, trying to adequately take in her beauty. “Close your eyes.” He said softly. She did as was told and he smiled again, leaning in ever so slowly until finally he pressed his lips to hers. She responded instantly and for a few seconds he taught her what it was to be kissed. He was the one to pull back and was gifted with seeing her eyes flutter open to look at him in awe. 

“I think I should like to have more lessons with you.” She whispered. 

“Perhaps another time. It’s getting late and is time for you to retire. I’ll show you to your chambers.” He replied placing a hand on her cheek and stroking it lovingly. His heart was soaring now and he didn’t think anything was possible of destroying his mood now. 

“Just one more before we end the night?” She requested. 

“Who am I to refuse the Queen?” He asked with a smile leaning in again and kissing her tenderly once more. “Come now, time for both us to each respectively retire for the night.” 

“Lord M…if we were to marry how would that work?” Victoria inquired as they began the walk back to her room. 

“Well…it would become fairly complicated and there would be much disgrace to face but it would be done as you are Queen.” 

“I don’t care what others think just so long as I will have you with me.” 

“Oh I don’t think I could ever leave you now ma’am.” He replied as they stopped in front of her room. 

“Thank you for the dance Lord M.” 

Melbourne bowed and smiled. “It was my pleasure ma’am. Sleep well tonight and I shall see you shortly after the sun rises.” 

“I look forward to it.” She replied, her face stretched by her smile. He in turn had a smile just as big as he took her hand and once more pressed a kiss to it. “Good night my Queen.” 

“Goodnight my Lord.” She parroted watching as he left down the corridor before closing her doors. 

Lord Melbourne walked away with an extra hop in his step, an uncontainable smile on his face, and his heart filled with joy. If Victoria was willing to go through disgrace to have the ability to love him then he was willing to do no less. She was his light and salvation and there was no way he could stop the ocean of love from consuming him with passion for her now. Then again…it’s not like he really wanted to stop and now he never would.


End file.
